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    一次不經意的失約

    在一個雨夾雪的傍晚,雪花和雨水纏在一起,到處是泥濘和積水,心情也和這天氣一樣,滿是交錯和無奈,陰霾,雜亂。踩在雪蓋的積水里,陰濕了鞋子和褲腳。就在這個時刻接到了一個你的電話,一個很久沒有聯系的朋友,一個陌生而熟悉的你,在這個下雨又飄雪的城市,在這車流涌動的傍晚,突然地來到了這個城市,約我在最繁華的商業區見面,剛放下工作的我猶豫了很久,失約了。正在我和朋友們坐在一起,聊得開心大笑時,收到了你的信息,“我還在那里等你,一個人面對著雨雪,你怎么還沒有來,害怕我啊,不敢來見我,還是...”。看到短信,我的心顫動了一下,此時已經是晚上十點鐘了,也不知是愧疚,還是男人的自責,我再也笑不出來了,想著你一個人,在一個漆黑的夜晚,孤獨無助地默默地等著一個男人,沒見過的男人,等啊等啊,等到小雨朦朧了窗欞,等到飄雪飄落了寒冷,也沒有出現該出現的男人。后來才知道,等待很久沒有出現我的身影,你一個人默默地走了,找了一家旅館住下,獨自望著窗外發呆,聆聽雪雨無聲的落下,悶熱的屋子里有些喘不上氣來,此時,才知道自己還沒有吃飯,才感覺到饑腸轆轆,隨便吃了一盒泡面,當做晚餐。在沉寂,孤獨,無奈的煎熬中,度過了一個難忘的夜晚。明白了等待是最傷人的煎熬,而我就是那個總讓人受傷害的男人,我不是柳下惠,也不是什么孔圣人。但是,每一個人做事都有自己的原則,自己的底線,我不會輕易傷害自己的每一個朋友,每一段情感,我也會去從內心尊重有情有義的女人。在漫長的漂泊中,我更多地學會了怎么保護自己,像刺猬一樣,渾身長滿了刺,誰和我靠的越近,受到的傷害也許越深。就算是有意的失約,也許都有難言的苦衷,尊重別人,也是對自己也是最好尊重。失約,我沒有任何借口,對不住雨夜等待的人,失約,讓我心底也有很多不忍,我也不是一個沒有感情的人,從此以后,我不會在失約,不會再讓一個女人為我空等。一次不經意的失約,也許是為了更好的相逢,不經過那雨夜的洗禮,怎么會知道彼此的真誠。
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