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    記住,輸什么最好別輸心情

    記住,輸什么最好別輸心情

    記住,輸什么最好別輸心情。歲月,可以軟化最鐵硬的心靈。不必費力氣與人爭辯,趕路要緊。
    人生高速運轉,總會留下一些心靈垃圾,記得經常清除這些廢棄物。成長過程中,總會遇到煩惱的事情,放棄也是一種寬容,最重要的是,輸什么也別輸心情。
    1、打掃心靈
    很多人都喜歡房子清掃過后煥然一新的感覺。同樣,理完發的感覺也十分美好,因為多余的東西去除了。
    兒童是快樂的,因為他沒有過多的心事,也沒有不必要的憂慮。而成人則不同,我們的生命中有太多的積壓物和太多想像出來的復雜以及一些擴大了的悲痛。
    用電腦的人都知道,回收站是需要經常清空的,否則會占用過多的空間,影響計算機的運轉速度。人的頭腦也是。你不能什么都扔掉,你也不能什么都留著。聰明的人是善于取舍的人,是適時取舍的人。有太多心事的人走不快,完全沒有心事的人又多半缺乏理性。
    而生命的難度也正在于此,你要不斷清掃和放棄一些東西,因為生命里填塞的東西愈少,就愈能發揮潛能”。記得一部戲里,一個人對主人公說:走吧,不要回頭,做不好不要回來。”他的意思是讓他離開這里,是希望不要讓過去拖累他。
    清掃心靈是一種掙扎與奮斗的過程。人生是一個不斷揮手的旅程,少年要告別家鄉,傷心人要告別傷心地,雄鷹要告別安逸,快樂要告別悲傷。沒有告別,就沒有成長,要堅強,就要勇于轉身,離別是為了更好地相聚。
    2、放棄也是一種寬容
    一個人就像一個國家一樣,沒有寬容便沒有成長。在一切成功要素中,胸懷是第一位,或者也可以說寬容是第一位的。
    有的時候,放棄進攻的言詞,放棄憤怒的沖動,放棄報復的渴望,本身就是一種寬容。
    聰明的人也經常要放棄解釋。在許多人看來,解釋就是掩飾。李敖說得好:有時解釋是不必要的,敵人不信你的解釋,朋友無須你的解釋。許多事情根本就無須解釋,天不晴有時就是因為雨沒下透,下透了就好了。
    成功的人不要怕挨罵,因為只要你做事,就會出錯,就會觸動一些人,就會引起某些人的不滿。事實上,能有50%的人贊成你就很不錯了,世上極少有百分之百的事情,越美的東西越容易打碎。要鍛煉自己正確對待反對的能力,要勇敢地主動去征詢反對意見。不要抱怨反對者,他完全可以有他的看法,這是他的自由,與你無關。不必費力氣去和他爭辯,趕路要緊。
    3、時間產生美
    幾乎每個人都有自己的傷心地,所以我們并不奇怪,一些看起來很重要的地方,比如故鄉、母校、原單位、初戀現場,卻并不見得有很多人踴躍地回去,那是因為有太多的故事在里面,有太多的沉重在原地。眼不見,心不煩。
    而當一切都可以看開時,往往也是沒有什么可以失去的時候,時間把往事都沖淡了,只留下了美好的記憶,青春的記憶,成長的記憶,拼搏的記憶,還有擦肩而過的燦爛笑容和寂寞黑夜里的溫暖燭光。我參加和采訪過許多個校慶,映入我眼簾最多的慈祥的白發和久別重逢的淚水漣漣。歲月,可以軟化最鐵硬的心靈。
    社會心理學家告訴我們,嫉妒產生于相近的業界和區域,沖突往往源自利益的糾纏。一切生物都暴露在劇烈的斗爭之中”,因為一切生物都有高速率增加的傾向,在資源有限的情況下,生存斗爭是不可避免的。而最劇烈的斗爭,差不多總是發生在同種的個體之間,因為它們居住在同一地域,需要同樣食料,遭受同樣威脅。一些緊張關系的緩和需要時間和距離,離得遠了,感覺無關緊要了,也便放得開了。遠遠地看去,許多事物都是很美的。
    所以我們不必為不能解決的問題沮喪,再不能解決的問題,也會在時間的洪流里消失。敵意也罷,誤解也罷,輕視也罷,矛盾也罷,都會隨著時間的推移而淡淡化開,時間可以使滄海變成桑田。
    4、引退的美學

    再好的眼睛,注視一件事物久了都會疲勞的,人的體力、情緒和智力周期,決定了一個人無法永遠留在高潮,在一個生命周期內,人不可避免地要走向低潮。一年便是一個生命周期。
    及時而漂亮的撤退與漂亮的進攻同樣重要。輔佐某人久了,連幸運女神也會累的”。重要的不是到場時博得別人的喝彩,而是離開時別人對你的想念。
    引退的美學,即善始善終。它的關鍵是終”的時機和方式。順利抽身退出要比順利地進入時更難,因為山頂很美,因為下山的時候人一般都比較疲憊。
    滾動的石頭上不長青苔”,不下這座山,便上不了那座山。人的一生會爬無數的山,每一座山都是那樣的別致,但沒有一座山真的值得你永遠地留下來。
    影響引退的一個因素是貪戀,另一個因素是過分執著。對于人生利益,任何一個人都不可過分執著。(人生感悟  )所謂不過分執著,就是不偏執于某一個方面,某一種欲望,某一種企圖,某一種目的,某一種過程。任何偏執都可能使人失去中肯的判斷,從而錯過了美景,貽誤了人生。
    5、輸什么也不能輸了心情
    你不可能因為給人一個微笑而喪失什么,因為它永遠會再回來”。東西怎么出去,就會怎么回來。沒有人不喜歡微笑。
    但問題是使人微笑的事物往往不在身邊,而令你煩躁、不安的事物卻往往揮之不去。不能與自己喜歡的人和事在一起,是許多人不快樂的根本原因,因為你沒有快樂的來源。
    曾經有段日子,我很惆悵,我喜歡的女孩不在乎我,我精心做的稿子被改來改去,我的身體也出了問題,感冒不時地光顧我,我的生活一塌糊涂。這時我的好朋友對我說:輸什么也不能輸了心情,有些事情放了吧”。我決定改變。我不再找那個女孩,那篇稿子我立即投往別處,我也告別了一度懶散而無規律的生活,每天開始打球和跑步。結果,我的身體變得健美起來,我的那篇稿子很快被發表,而且還得了獎,我不再在乎”了的那個女孩開始在乎起了我……
    一個人或事能令你不舒服是一定有著什么原因的,有的原因要過很久你才有可能知道,而有些原因你永遠都不會知道,但這些都并不重要,重要的是它使你不舒服,他會影響你的心情,影響到你的判斷,也影響到你的時間。
    給別人一個重新認識你的機會,給自己一個認識更廣闊世界的機會,有什么不好?

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